To start talking about this, we have a typical trigger question: is it possible to have a ‘lasting relationship’ being a teenager? The answer is yes and no. We will answer this with another question: when teenagers find boyfriends or girlfriends, do they want the relationship to last and have a future?
The saying is self-explaining: 'it will last as long as you care for it and you’ll keep your partner for as long as you desire'.
People say that the time a relationship lasts depends on both parts of the couple. Personally, we think that it also depends on society or the person’s group of friends.
According to various studies, the ‘romantic love’ depends on three factors: physical attraction, intimacy (which means to thoroughly know your partner) and commitment.
During adolescence is very common to feel the ‘attraction’ towards the other person, because society stands that the ‘outside’ of a person is extremely exposed and it is given great importance when you start going out with someone.
Obviously, without the combination of the three factors, a lasting relationship is impossible. If there is only attraction, it will be only a ‘moment of love’ or a chance to discover that that person will never be ‘THE one’ and that he or she will be attracted to other people (sooner or later).
The most important thing is to be committed: if there’s no commitment, the relationship won’t last. You must feel the urge of being with someone and see that person as a perfect companion in the future.
Typically, teenagers have shorter relationships because adolescence is a stage in which people instinctively seek for many different experiences and try almost everything once. Adolescence is about discovering who you are, what values you consider to be important and what you want to achieve in life.
That’s why we believe that romantic relationships in adolescence are established –mainly, there’s always the exception to the rule- to have fun. Dating someone is an opportunity to go to new places and live new experiences. Dating can be a way to fit in a group of friends; if all your friends go out with someone, one can also feel the need to find a ‘soul mate’. For some people, going out with someone, is a matter of ‘social status’.
The reality –and so often heard from teachers, grandparents, mothers or even psychologists- is that during adolescence we exaggerate things. Everything is new and unique, that’s why we believe our first girlfriend or boyfriend is actually ‘the love of our lives’, ‘the one’ and so on.
But…is it possible to find ‘true love’ during adolescence? This, we’ll discuss next time.
Malena Avagliano, Macarena Beceiro, Valeria Gasol and Camila Periale - 5th Year
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